Touché

What did the cowboy say when we walked into the car dealership?

Audi

Howdy partner??? dunno
what???

Quote from CSU1 :

Howdy partner??? dunno
what???

Invisible text mate.
Highlight it

Not technically a joke, but had to put it in here....

Talk about a country bastardising a language!

Oh ya! LMAO!!! Audi partner ahahahamhamhamahhamhaaa! :sadbanana

Quote from CSU1 :

Oh ya! LMAO!!! Audi partner ahahahamhamhamahhamhaaa! :sadbanana

[lame joke]No no no no, it's a Peugeot Partner[/lame joke]

Quote from whitey6272 :

A Chinese man goes for an interview and gets the job he’s told he is in the warehouse in charge of supplies so he goes to warehouse.

A month or so later he hasn’t picked up his wages more time passes and the boss goes to the warehouse to see what’s going on he goes in its all silent and then suddenly out of a box jumps the China man shouting


supplies!!!!!

lol...
however... why would he wait that long

Wife:'Do you like my cake?'
Guy:'It's very nice. Did you bought it yourself?'

what's the difference between a car tyre and 365 comdoms?
one's a goodyear and the other's a very good year

:sadbanana ??? What Lol!!!!!!

Quote from anbiddulph :

*COUGH* LOOK AGAIN *COUGH*
IDIOT

Quote from Captain Slow :

*cough* im a deadbeat *cough*

...

Quote from Captain Slow :

...

Yes...

A bookjoke...

The Painter by:
R.T.Stick

EDIT:

????

A couple were going out for the evening. They'd gotten ready, all dolled up, dog put out, etc. The taxi arrives, and as the couple start out, the dog shoots back in the house. They don't want the dog shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the dog out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver:"He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother."A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab.
"Sorry I took so long" he says. "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching and biting me as I hauled her ass downstairs and tossed her in the back yard! She better not sh*t in the vegetable garden again either!"

Quote from mr grady :

A couple were going out for the evening. They'd gotten ready, all dolled up, dog put out, etc. The taxi arrives, and as the couple start out, the dog shoots back in the house. They don't want the dog shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the dog out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver:"He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother."A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab.
"Sorry I took so long" he says. "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching and biting me as I hauled her ass downstairs and tossed her in the back yard! She better not sh*t in the vegetable garden again either!"

LAWL!
good eleven!


Why did the germ across the microscope?
to get to the other slide

Your momma is so fat, she even got her own website! Herspace.com!

Quote from mr grady :

A couple were going out for the evening. They'd gotten ready, all dolled up, dog put out, etc. The taxi arrives, and as the couple start out, the dog shoots back in the house. They don't want the dog shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the dog out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver:"He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother."A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab.
"Sorry I took so long" he says. "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching and biting me as I hauled her ass downstairs and tossed her in the back yard! She better not sh*t in the vegetable garden again either!"

lmao thats a good one

two parrots are sitting on a perch.

one says, "can you smell fish?"




im sorry if this offends any parrots or fish.

Did you hear about the scarecrow who won the nobel prize for being outstanding in his field?


im off to cook the tea............latersssssssssssss

Where do you take a sick horse? Horsepital

Where do pigs live? In styscrapers

http://www.rinkworks.com/jokes/

Pringles wins the pot
Any worse and theyre not jokes anymore.

Quote from mr grady :

two parrots are sitting on a perch.

one says, "can you smell fish?"

Quote from mr grady :

Did you hear about the scarecrow who won the nobel prize for being outstanding in his field?

Both awesome. Added to memory for use at parties (I'm honestly liking them!)

An old man, a boy & a donkey were going to town. The boy rode on the donkey & the old man walked. As they went along they passed some people who remarked it was a shame the old man was walking & the boy was riding.

The man & boy thought maybe the critics were right, so they changed positions.

Later, they passed some people that remarked, "What a shame, he makes that little boy walk."

They then decided they both would walk! Soon they passed some more people who thought they were stupid to walk when they had a decent donkey to ride. So, they both rode the donkey.

Now they passed some people that shamed them by saying how awful to put such a load on a poor donkey.

The boy & man said they were probably right, so they decide to carry the donkey. As they crossed the bridge, they lost their grip on the animal & he fell into the river and drowned.

The moral of the story ?

If you try to please everyone, you might as well...

Kiss your ass goodbye!

and its goodnight from me.

2 flys were riding on a motorcycle.
"STOP!" "STOP!" the co-rider fly screams:

"I have a FLY in my eye!

lamerossa!

this is a two joke joke

what do you call a gay dinosaur????
MEGA-SORE-ASS

what do you call a lesbian dinosaur???
LICK-A-LOTTA-PUS