We all need to realise how important family and freinds can be, and what life will be like when one of them is taken away. I found this out the hard way. i have just been told that yesterday @ half 7, my good freind jason hopkins unfortunately died from lung failure. He was a great freind and had a one of a kind personality. An hour before his death, i had an argument with him, with me and him leaving each other on a bad note, and this is when guilt and sadness kicks in on these types of situations. I have started to ask myself "should i have treated him better?" "am i a bad person?" and now, he is dead. So keep your freinds and familys close everyone, and if you ever fall out, sort it out as fast as possible, because you never know what will happen next.

You're not guilty at all, and he would have told you the same i am sure. Remember the good times of your friendship, that's what counts after all. :Handshake

Sorry for your loss.

i feel very bad for you...
i know that he's not mad at you...
i know he has forgiven you 5 min after you had an argument...
and remember, it's not your fault...
its..
its life, and to be honest, life can be a bitch...
enjoy life, pray to your friend, you never know he might leave a sign, but i know he can hear you

sorry for bad language, but its true

I know how you feel Nathan.

My bestest mate Nick is in Hospital after a very bad car crash. He was driving a 1.6 16v Clio after 2 months of driving. He was racing another car, lost control doing circa 90mph, smashed through a very sturdy couple of trees and hedge, he was flown from the car as he wasn't wearing a seat belt. Kind of "lucky" he was flown from the car as it landed bang on its roof and would of crushed him.

I have been to see him and he is still unconscious, his face is all mangled after being smashed through the windscreen, he has broken his back, broken 3 ribs and punchured his lung. We are best mates, but we did fight and now I'm thinking if he doesnt pull through, should I treated him better?

Remember this Nathan, you both knew, if he was going to go this suddenly, you would of done anything not to fall out.

It's hard when its your mates, but just keep your chin up, I'm sure thats what he would of wanted.

You have my MSN if you need a chat fella.

-hug-

Quote from Nathan_French_14 :

We all need to realise how important family and freinds can be

Family and Friends are all i got... they die i die

Thanks for all your replys and advice, it has helped re-assure me this was'nt my fault.

Thanks

btw, sorry to hear about your freind niall, i hope he pulls through.

You can't blame yourself for what happens in life Nathan, these things happen and we can't let them grind us down. I'm sure your mate would want you to remember the good times, the laughs and not dwell on this one fall out.

i have been thinking about the laughs we have had together, and it has helped. It's not that im too upset about it, its just that its shock more then anything. Jason never had a problem with his lungs ever in his life, he was in redditch junior football team, and played alot of sports, yet his lungs suddenly packed up :/

idk,

Thats Gods way of being a Bastard mate.

"The good die young" and in this case, it must be true.

When you next get the chance, get a load of mates to meet up and raise a glass to your good mate Jason and have a nice drink celebrating his life. The best you can do is remember him in the best way you can.

hang in there man...I have lost my best friend 2.5 month ago, and still am extremely depressed...

it's hard, the last thing you need is to blame yourself... just be strong.
Time heals

Sorry to hear that Nathan. you have my sympathy.

I had a very similar situation with my dad. He had an silly argument with my sister in-law and i got involved, sticking up for her. 15 mins later he dropped dead in front of me after suffering a massive heart attack. He was only 56.

It turned out his arteries were severely clogged and he would have dropped dead at the first sign of stress...but obviously my Sister in-law and i feel guilty as hell. It was smoking that killed him, but we felt like we had killed him indirectly.


Life can end in the blink of an eye, at the most unexpected moments.

So yes, your right... be good to your friends and family, and treasure all the good times together.

I wish you and his family all the best.
Stu

My condolences, Nathan. Don't know what else I can say

I'm sorry for your loss. My father-in-law passed away almost 2 weeks ago.

Sorry mate , live the life to the maximum, i think that your friend would like you to live like that.....
i hope i explained, im not very good with english

Quote from chanoman315 :

Sorry mate , live the life to the maximum, i think that your friend would like you to live like that.....
i hope i explained, im not very good with english

It made perfect sense mate.

Very sorry to hear it frenchy, it's awful when someone close leaves the world. But don't sweat - like the other wise ones here have said, I'm sure he forgave as soon as you left the room.

I hear you about keeping close. Last night I got a reality check - a very good mate's sister tried to OD by taking most of her medication. She's in hospital under observation because the meds are slow-release and they don't know what could happen to her. This is only a coupla years after the same mate lost his mum to a decade-long battle with cancer, which sent him into an awful downward spiral he's only just coming out of. I tell ya, the shit life throws at you makes you appreciate the hell out of the people who love you that are still here. I think I oughta call my folks now...

Quote from The General Lee :

I know how you feel Nathan.

My bestest mate Nick is in Hospital after a very bad car crash. He was driving a 1.6 16v Clio after 2 months of driving. He was racing another car, lost control doing circa 90mph, smashed through a very sturdy couple of trees and hedge, he was flown from the car as he wasn't wearing a seat belt. Kind of "lucky" he was flown from the car as it landed bang on its roof and would of crushed him.

I have been to see him and he is still unconscious, his face is all mangled after being smashed through the windscreen, he has broken his back, broken 3 ribs and punchured his lung. We are best mates, but we did fight and now I'm thinking if he doesnt pull through, should I treated him better?

Remember this Nathan, you both knew, if he was going to go this suddenly, you would of done anything not to fall out.

It's hard when its your mates, but just keep your chin up, I'm sure thats what he would of wanted.

You have my MSN if you need a chat fella.

-hug-

Just a quick update on my friend.

Today he had an operation on his back, it all went well, but the results from the operation will determine if he will be able to walk or will be paralyzed. His head is in a brace to hold he jaw and other parts of his face together. He is also in a full "body cage"

"Good" news is his punctured lung is now semi inflating.

I really hope this isn't another victim of British roads...

Don't you hate your Friend for being so irrisponsible General Lee, im curious, personally, i love cars alot, if my friend almost killed himself because he wanted to race on public roads. Our Friendship is over.

Ah uncool.

I lost my best friend of 16 years almost a month ago, he was killed on his motorcycle after only having his licence for a month. Its been shit since and I miss him everyday, so yeah hold in there as it gets easier as the time passes.

I wouldn't say I hate him, not at this stage anyway. He was actually racing someone else I know, and instead of turning around and helping him, he drove off, so I hate him.

The funeral for jason was today. The parents insisted on us not to wear black, but to just wear something smart. They did'nt want today to be depressing for everyone, but as we were watching the coffin being lowered, everyone could'nt help but shed a tear, including me. After the funeral, we all went to jason's house, and had a nice chat about the memories of him. Earlier that day in school, our year head talked about how jason had been lost, and that in a week or two, we should all organise a charity event for the childrens hospital's. Then we had a few minutes silence in rememberance. In my own way of remembering jason, i am going to have have his signature, his favourtie quote and R.I.P on my mini, as he used to race in the league with me, and we had some great battles together.

Like i have said before in this thread, keep your freinds and family close, and whenever you fall out, make up asap. Even if it is'nt your fault.

Regards,
Frenchy

p.s, give your freind my best wishes for recovery niall, i hope to hear he is well soon.

Tough luck, Nathan, just if u talk allot of him it will go much better then sticking it all up in ur mind etc... just let it out and u'll be fine

good luck mate..

I'm sure your friend would be proud of the respect, maturity and dignity you have shown for him following his death. Try to remember the good times, have a drink for him and go on with your life as he would want you too..
I'm not particulary religious, but I feel this sums up a lot.:-

One night I had a dream--
I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord
and across the sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene I noticed two sets of footprints,
one belonged to me and the other to the Lord.
When the last scene of my life flashed before me,
I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that many times along the path of my life,
there was only one set of footprints.
I also noticed that it happened at the very lowest
and saddest times in my life.
This really bothered me and I questioned the Lord about it.
"Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you would walk with me all the way,
but I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life
there is only one set of footprints.
"I don't understand why in times when I needed you most,
you should leave me."
The Lord replied, "My precious, precious child,
I love you and I would never, never leave you
during your times of trial and suffering.
"When you saw only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."

Quote from Scrabby :

Tough luck, Nathan, just if u talk allot of him it will go much better then sticking it all up in ur mind etc... just let it out and u'll be fine

good luck mate..

i have been talking about him with freinds etc. We are all soon going to meet up and have a drink etc thinking about him. Thanks btw

I know that i can't give you any words of wisdom of things that iv done after losing a close friend. So all i can leave you with is the comfort that im always around, and you know how to get ahold of me at anytime.

Adam