My worst date was about 18 or so, going to the cinema with a girl I had fancied all through school, during the film of course there was no eye to eye contact and no words exchanged, I was shy then and without being able to detect any signals with the distraction of the film I did not know where I stood and whether I could hug, hold hands, kiss, or whatever -- I have never gone on a first date to the cinema since.

Worse was I planned to have some conversation alone between us at least when I dropped her off, maybe coffee or some such, but alas it was a double date and my freind wanted dropping off last because he had something to say to me...... Well, ok I obliged, and it turns out he wanted to ask how far I got with her. BASTARD! No night cap for me...

I'm so glad I have more confidence these days, I was a right shy twat. Still despite my more matured confidence in recent tears I was still totally unprepared for how forward my current partner was on our first date: She seemed so shy too, what a paradox... The first date lasted 6 days.

EDIT: I just remembered a worse one. A friend and I where flirting with these girls at a party and got their number (they lived in the same house). I called them up and arranged to meet, they took one look at me sober and told me to piss off.

EDIT 2: Oh that reminds me of another time with the same friend, we picked up a girl he liked on the way to this party in Hertford - no idea who's - I got thrown out for doing drugs but then got a call to come back because they needed a lift home so I go back and most of the revellers and I got on really well, too well, the girl my friend was interested in and I got on really really really well, and where making out on the couch when the host (who threw me out earlier) finds us and starts berrating the girl for ... betraying her husband. Yup, my friend (and consequently me) had pulled a bi curious housewife playing away from home. That was an awkward ride home.

Quote from batteryy :

you think you can have a reasonable talk to a man whos coming towards you fast and angry with a cricket bat?

He took the saying "Speak softly and carry a big stick" a bit too literally.

Quote from Becky Rose :

EDIT: I just remembered a worse one. A friend and I where flirting with these girls at a party and got their number (they lived in the same house). I called them up and arranged to meet, they took one look at me sober and told me to piss off.

How **** can some people be?

Truelly horrible way of saying no, and it must been hard. Good to see things whent good in the end / good things in the end

Quote from Becky Rose :

...

Wow thats been some eventful dates.

I have to say, taking into account all my first dates, they all tend to go well. Well by 'well' I mean they are not married or their dads chase me around in a car lol.

Quote from MAD3.0LT :

my funnyest first date i was chating to a chick on msn for a few weeks then i tould her id come say hello (10:00 pm) as im allmost their i said on the phone when i get their u had better be naked she laughed. Once i knocked on her door their she was in a black nighty so we had a few drinks talked and then i said why arnt you naked and her response make me. then yer kiss and all the other sexual things .

then she turned into a good casual bootycall

woooh, reading this took me longer than reading TVE's, bloody hard to understand...
and i think it's meant to be the very first date in your life thread

since i can't recall anything special on my date i thought it makes no sense to write it down. But i sure like to read others

In Uzbekistan there are many bikes. We use them alot, if a bike does not grant you passage into his hole of joy then the bike is terminated. Is this what western society call a snuff film?

Quote from -NightFly- :

i think it's meant to be the very first date in your life thread

oh, I thought it was any awkward first date. I know this makes me sound significantly worse than I am, but I don't remember which girl was my first date / kiss. I've actually been trying to remember for weeks already since I was talking to a friend about the subject \and for the life of me I can't put them in order.

subscribed i will tune in when i get one to tune in about

this is what i got so far, ask out to movies as a casual get-together, see a horror movie (or what she wants) so you can huddle in 'fear'. after movie take a nice walk down the long senic road, during which say, i think i like ou more then a friend, kiss her bye

any improvement suggestions?

come on that is so clichéd!!!

Quote from JJ72 :

come on that is so clichéd!!!

english please

Quote from logitekg25 :

english please

It is english but copy and paste from dictionary;

A trite or overused expression or idea or a person or character whose behavior is predictable.

To say it more easy. A thing that often is meant positive, but movies and people have used it so much it has lost all it's meaning over the time.
Like saying something as "your eyes looks like pearls" or something similar, just doesn't work nowdays even if it's actually a great thing to say.

Quote from The Very End :

"your eyes looks like pearls"

Small, glazed, misty-white and created from a piece of sand? Sexy

Quote from logitekg25 :

any improvement suggestions?

Aha, a trainee in the art of first dates. OK, here's a few tips for the novice:

For a start I personally hate going to cinema as a first date (see above story). there's no communication so you don't know where you really stand, personally I find the whole thing embarassing and awkward as a first date. Some people seem to thrive on it, I avoid first dates at the cinema like the plague.

I like to be able to talk and listen to my date so any setting that encourages this is good, then just talk... Getting the balance right should come naturally, if it doesnt (aka, you're an ****) then you need to work on this.

Unless she's too stupid for the stuff I can think of saying I don't often get a quiet moment because i'm old and wise enough to be able to pull out lots of stock conversation. Although it hass happened to me where I have just given up trying to talk on the grounds my date was too thick to understand anything more than Hollyoaks and Eastenders.

However I do understand (and sometimes experience) silence induced nerves... The only cure is having stock conversations/jokes that you acquire through experience and practice, which you can pull out in a quiet moment and get the conversation going again.

The other thing, when you are sitting there in awkward silence, there is usually something you are too embarassed to say on top of your head. I've found that I can quite often get away with saying it anyway, or just going in for a snog.

So to recap: Fix silence with stock jokes/conversation; saying what you are too embarassed to say anyway; or snogging.

Quote from Dajmin :

Small, glazed, misty-white and created from a piece of sand? Sexy

Fu, don't ruin my point

Quote from Becky Rose :

So to recap: Fix silence with stock jokes/conversation; saying what you are too embarassed to say anyway; or snogging.

Agree on this. Or just talk! Talk about anything. You canot rely on the other part to take care of the speaking, so ask the person things, tell your own experience with the thing and such, just keep on chatting. Even if it's not romantic it's giving a BIG +, because then you prove that you are interested and actually capable of having a conversation on a normal matter.

Jokes works as charm too, sometimes pull a joke on the other part, just keep the level offensiveness low, or it will just be looked as rude.

The only time the cinema works as a first date is if you follow it with dinner, because then if you run out of conversation you can at least talk about the film or the food.

I guess if you really suck at it, you could plan ahead. Think about what you want to say ahead of time and work out the possible conversation branches. That way you'll always have something to say and if you take charge of the conversation you can guide it to a binary answer so it heads in the right direction

Once again I agree with Becky, that admitting you're clueless can be a pretty good conversation starter in itself.

Further reading for the insecure:

I'm probably the wrong person to get dating advise from anyway, i'm hardly the lesbian embodiment of Cassanova, I remember when I was young I being very unsure of myself on dates, not knowing what to do and not having yet learned how to read my date to know what she is ready for.

Well as time has gone by I still dont know how to read what my date wants, instead, I tell her what I want...

I either just go ahead and bite the bullet, or to state my intentions very clearly...

Once for example, my opening line was to say loudly to my friend "I'm just popping to the bathroom, but when I get back i'm going to chat up that girl there [pointing]". Made eye contact, smiled, and went to the bathroom. I'm still friends with the girl I failed to pickup that day (turns out she had a GF, but I wasnt even sure she was gay when I did that).

Stating your intention before you do it can work wonders in establishing what your date is ready for - also it removes the chance of a suprise reaction. Leaning in for a kiss when your date is self conscious over some personal insecurity will fail, leaning in for a kiss when your date knows she's about to get her first kiss with you and has had a chance to prepare herself and you've scored a result.

Infact when it comes to cold pickups (ie, when you dont know them) stating your intention is part of the art, for instance I picked up my last GF by going up to her, saying "Are you single, interesting, and English speaking?" and smiling. Again, I knew nothing about her before I did that.

Before i've used such lines as "If I said that was a nice belt would you hold it against me?". Pickup lines are great for stating your intention, but even when you know the girl you can do the same, I was at a fareground once and my date said to me, "You win that teddy bear and i'll snog your mouth off". The only downside about that one was it cost me a fortune to win the bloody teddy bear...

Being clear about what you want will work wonders in those early stages, removes those quiet awkward moments, and gets you to where you want to go.

You do need to also have the bottle to go through with it though. You say to someone "I am going to dent your headboard" and then pass out means a bigger fail than not saying anything at all

geez thanks for the advise!! it took me a while to read all of that!! but i am such an amature i am only 14...i can still have some fun before it matters!

Quote from Becky Rose :

I'm probably the wrong person to get dating advise from anyway, i'm hardly the lesbian embodiment of Cassanova,

so does that make you a butch or a femme?

Quote from Dajmin :

I guess if you really suck at it, you could plan ahead. Think about what you want to say ahead of time and work out the possible conversation branches. That way you'll always have something to say and if you take charge of the conversation you can guide it to a binary answer so it heads in the right direction

Reminds me of this:





I've yet to have a proper "date" in the true sense of the word. Random nights out in town with friends are far more fun anyway, you meet way more interesting people, and you can take your pick afterwards And if the whole thing doesn't work, at worst you have a few friends to hang around with

Quote from bunder9999 :

so does that make you a butch or a femme?

I dont fit that well into a neatly defined preconception, which stereotype are you?

My "first date" was to the cinema with a girl from college, it went well, although I think she was kind of waiting for me to make a move, because when we were saying bye she said "oh for god sake at least give me a hug"

(Im crap at making the first move)

Quote from mcintyrej :

My "first date" was to the cinema with a girl from college, it went well, although I think she was kind of waiting for me to make a move, because when we were saying bye she said "oh for god sake at least give me a hug"

(Im crap at making the first move)

I remember the best thing to do is to make the move a suprise (no not suprise sex/rape) but I don't know what it was, I was bragging to a girl that my hair was awesome and soft (because I use female shampoo/conditioner), and she ended up smelling my hair, and as she pulled away I said to her, hmm let me smell your hair, then as I said "mmm nice" I pulled her up and kissed her, needless to say that night in the car ended up very nicely

Quote from BlueFlame :

I remember the best thing to do is to make the move a suprise (no not suprise sex/rape) but I don't know what it was, I was bragging to a girl that my hair was awesome and soft (because I use female shampoo/conditioner), and she ended up smelling my hair, and as she pulled away I said to her, hmm let me smell your hair, then as I said "mmm nice" I pulled her up and kissed her, needless to say that night in the car ended up very nicely

I'd end up headbutting her or getting a line totally wrong.

"Let me smell your hair, trust me I am normal - I learnt that line from the inter....Where are you going?"