Ok, rules are:

Post the truth only, no BS lies or made up story's, they can be accident's you've caused in work, on the road or whatever, or accidents you've fell victim to.

I'll start the ball rolling!

Summertime of 05' working on building a new Tesco's. It was my first on the job helping the builders do what they do and the foreman directs me over to help Mick. Now, I'm not sure weather there was some mis-communication between Mick and the foreman about who I was and what I could do(first day on-site and clueless a teenager)and me being me if someone asks me to do something I just jump into it. In this case "it" was a big yellow dumper filled to the brim with quick drying cement. Mick shout's "Pete, grab that dumper and follow me over to the crane". The crane, situated alongside a rather large deep hole was lifting the first section of a a high tention electrical pylon....you know when they say that accidents are usually a combination of failures of systems? , well what unfolded next was no failure of systems nor machinery, it was me, I Failed at driving dumpers. So, I sat back and watched the other five or six dumpers until I was last in line, I really didn't want to go near it, but I had too. Straight into the hole the dumper went!, me nearly with it, it seemed like an eternity as I watched others watching me watching the bubbling pit of failure. I thimk there were three reasons why it happened 1. the top of my boot getting stuck in the floor of the dumper not allowing me to brake 2. in my minds eye I seen myself driving into the hole 3. it was damn slippy. Needless to say I got a right bollocking and had to make some effort to pay for the BS. My dumper still rests in it's place(was easyer and cheaper to leave it be)

I have one, and although i wasn't alone in this, i was heavily involved.

We were on the way to dover to catch the boat over to france to then drive through into belgium for car racing (CAMSO bangers at warneton) and the traffic around london was ridiculous, m25 was rubbish.

So, there we are in an old 1989 ford cargo with crew cab, 7 of us in there in total, a hiab and beavertail body with 2 bangers on it, plus all the tools, on a boiling hot day, heaters turned on as the truck was overheating in the traffic, so i suggested to my mate that he open his door and i would open mine the other side to get some air in as we were only travelling at ~10 mph in the big traffic jam..

As we did this, a renault clio full of nice looking girls came past us slowly in the crawling traffic, and my mate starts waving and shouting 'alright girls!' while being half out of the door, while we leaned over and waved too, all of the girls pretend to be shy, but then all start waving and smiling anyway, including the driver, who was too busy smiling and waving to notice that the traffic had stopped in front....

She planted herself directly into the back of an 07 plate jag, not a mark on that one, but her bumper fell off, and all her mates? they just pointed at her and all want 'hahaha, serves you right for not looking!'

We did feel kind of guilty, but she was cool with it, eventhough she was blushing and going stupidly red from the embarrasment of stacking her car because she was looking at some lads instead of the road.

That is a win in my book Dan.

well, there was this time back in 2007 where i was having a ride with my wonderfull race bike that i had found inside those huge garbage bins. anyway, i was riding on the street and saw that there was a traffic jam, so i decided to go on the sidewalk so that i dont get hit by a car. It was going well until a douche in a Mazda Protegé tried to get to the parking lot of home depot alike store. instead of parking inside the parking lot, HE BRAKED ON THE MIDDLE OF THE GEWDAMM'd SIDEWALK! and there i was, with my road bike that had the tires so slick that when i used BOTH of the brakes, i went into a 20-25m drift ( it was an awesome feeling to pull that off with that bike eventhough i knew it was going to hurt ).

I could see the dude's face going red when he saw me sideways trying to avoid contact with him and his fugly car. the worst happend. the front wheel got most of the impact, after the '' shunt '', the rear wheel became airborne. I was lucky that it got sideways because i would have flown over the handle bars, but because of that, all my weight made the rest of the bike hit the car. i dont remember how, but i somehow managed to sit infront of the car after leaving somewhat of a bump on the passenger's door.

i should have sued him for innapropriate driving , but who cares anyway! Im still alive, that's what matters!

Quote from CSU1 :

My dumper still rests in it's place(was easyer and cheaper to leave it be)

haha, so buried under a Tesco somewhere is your crashed dumper truck?

Quote from el pibe :

i should have sued him for innapropriate driving , but who cares anyway! Im still alive, that's what matters!

You were driving on the sidewalk, pretty sure that's illegal no matter where you live. Stopping (stopping, not parking!) on it, however, is not

When I was about 10, I was riding my bike up the street and changed gear. As the gears were a bit faulty, I'd usually look between my legs to check if the new gear had engaged properly. I did this and as I wasn't looking where I was going, managed to faceplant myself smack into the back of my friend's older brother's XR3i which was parked on the side of the road and was his pride and joy. This particular car had a massive rubber (don't ask me why it was rubber) spoiler on the boot lid and to my surprise, my impact had left a perfect bite-mark on the rubber surface, which stayed there as long as I remember him having the car.

Most of my accidents seem so unfunny in comparison to these

I was driving home late one night in the beast that is the Yaris, with a mate following me in a mahoosive Landcruiser. The roads were almost deserted, so we were giving it fair welly. There was a car in front of me at one stage, tipping away at 80/90-ish, so we slowed down to follow. Next thing I know he stopped dead in the middle of the road, going downhill on a greasy ass road. I somehow managed to grind to a halt microns from his back bumper, but for a good 5/6 seconds I heard a screeching behind me, and saw a Landcruiser aiming for me. The inevitable bang came, but luckily the car in front was actually trying to turn right, and had finished turning, because I was pushed down the road for a good 20 feet, even with my brakes locked. We got out and surveyed the damage, nothing major other than a few scratches to my boot, he had bullbars so no airbags had gone off. We heard sirens, so we got back in and pegged it away onto the motorway before we were caught

A couple of 17 year olds racing down the city outskirts crash in the middle of the road with no witnesses and about 200 feet of skidmarks, I don't think that would have gone well.

Also had my first tip parking, the first day after getting my full licence. I was parking in the local underground shopping centre carpark, so I went down wheels spinning, tearing around corners, smoke everywhere. The first space I found was beside 2 girls getting out of a Corsa or something (the point is, they looked hot :shy, so I skidded to a halt, threw it into reverse (with a satisfying crunch), and tried to burnout into the space. What I didn't see was the red and white striped support pillar on my offside, and smacked into it with a nice cracking noise. I was too embarrassed to finish the manoeuvre, so I ran away

And another embarrassing moment was when I was parking outside my friend's girlfriend's house dropping her home, I mounted the kerb outside her door and as I brought the offside back onto the road (it's a wide footpath...), I heard a lovely crack as my sump smacked into the concrete. There was no damage done, not even leaking

And another one was one of my first weeks driving on my own, I came into a multistory car park in town (one with the really smooth floors) with a friend beside me, and thought it would be an idea to burnout around the corner from where you get your ticket to the ramp leading up to next floor. I managed it fine, smoke billowing everywhere of course, and hit the ramp in second doing a good 60km/h. I heard a very loud bang, and stopped at the top to investigate. No damage whatsoever, it's still a mystery

Another multistory fail I had was in a different one, only a couple of weeks ago. I had a couple of lads in the car from school, as were out on lunch. They wanted me to go to the roof, as one lad's dad worked in an office across the street and they wanted to shout obscenities (as you do...). We got to the top, and there was a fair puddle. Feeling brave, I parked with my front wheels in the puddle, took her to the redline and dropped the clutch. The car spun for a few seconds on the spot somehow, but then launched off on me, and I had to go around the corner in front. I decided to rip the handbrake for the laugh, even though this was on grippy stuff and it was dry out. It worked anyway, and I slid sideways for about 30/40 feet. But then the car was more than likely on two wheels, as it found grip again. I got out to inspect the damage, and found the rear mudguard had gotten trapped under a metal strip running along the ground, and pulled half the car in the air rather than fall off. <3 Toyota engineering

Actually, this car has been given some abuse in its time, including at least 200 miles so far of being redlined down the motorway in 5th to top out at 190km/h. But it doesn't show any of it, and still demolishes any other car less than a 1.4l (it's a 1.0l). I'm convinced the Toyota plant made a mistake and put something else under the bonnet, it's even beaten a 2.0l turbo Avensis in a race I know I give it way too much abuse, but it's only a temporary car while I'm waiting for mine to be ready (next weekend actually), and it seems to love taking abuse The tyres are still road legal even after 6 months of burnouts from every stop sign/red light, handbrake turns on anything from gravel to concrete and understeering around roundabouts at 80km/h. It's been rear-ended by a 2 tonne jeep with nothing but a scratch. I've been practising my short-throws (with nice clunking and grinding as a by-product) and it still engages all gears spot on. It's more indestructible than a Hilux

Quote from dougie-lampkin :

...

You certainly sound like a bit of a cock.

Only stupid thing i've done is take my car down to the local park and ride after work when it was *covered* in snow to have a little fun, only to find it locked. I tried to turn round, not realising the "ground" was a dropped kerb followed by a foot high kerb, topped with snow so it looked level. Moderate grounding and a little beaching ensued.

Quote from Jakg :

You certainly sound like a bit of a cock.

Why thank you

Wait, didn't you crash into a ditch after coming across a "postman", because you were driving too fast for the conditions? Yea, sorry, the only crash I've ever had wasn't even my fault, I was rear-ended by someone not paying attention

Note to self - next time I'm faced with a "van" coming directly at me and I have a choice between a head on or beaching it on a verge I should obviously take the head-on option because it'll make my image look better.

On my first ever motorbike, riding into back lane that leads to back garden, petrol starts to run out. Only doing about 5 or 10 mph, I lean over on left side of bike to switch main tank to aux. Fuel starts going thru sooner than I was expecting, and bike accelerates. I'm thrown off balance, still hanging on with right hand, which is wrapped round handlebar throttle. Falling backwards, right hand turns throttle full on. Bike goes even faster, I'm just about hanging on, and we reach a bend. Unfortunately, there's a lamp-post there, which I hit at quite a speed, fly off, just missing lamp-post (and serious injury), and wedge myself in a large overgrown hedge.

Bike was written off, and insurance only paid out pittance on a month old bike.

Few years later, but on much larger bike, I'm following traffic on busy road in heavy rain. Three buses on other side of road. Middle bus decides to pull right out (he was close behind lead bus), and has to pull out onto wrong side of road due to angle. Car in front of me bangs on brakes and slides to a stop not far from front of bus. I slam on brakes, but just slide...straight into back of car. Policeman gets out of car. Comes round back and helps me to my feet. "Congratulations mate! This was an unmarked police car few seconds earlier!" Policeman sees I'm ok (vehicles damaged: smashed his light cluster mainly, but my bike fairing, front wheel and forks bit bent and broken), and goes to see driver of bus.

Bus driver later charged with driving offence, and I get full repairs on the bike.

Quote from morpha :

You were driving on the sidewalk, pretty sure that's illegal no matter where you live. Stopping (stopping, not parking!) on it, however, is not

by bike, i meant pushbike. i'm pretty sure it's legal to use em on the sidewalk

Im guessing this thread was meant to be more of a prank sort of accident thread but a few people are posting up acctuall accidents they had so i thought i may as well post up mine.
2 or so months ago i was on my way to college on my geared bike, it was wet because it had been raining but it had stopped raining by the time i left.
I went through a loose S bend which drops towards the middle and rises at each side. On the way down towards the right i didnt notice a drain cover slap bang where i was heading and im guessing my tyre slipped on it. Next thing i know i feel my bike slip out from under me and slam to the floor with my right foot trapped underneath the bike, i then slide along for a bit slowing down from 20-30mph.
Im only wearing converses so having the bike pin my foot into the ground caused quite a bit of skin to be ripped away.
Spent a week in hospital, spent the 2 weeks after that hopping around, then since then until 2 fridays ago i had weekly appointments for them to check my ankle.
But it's healed up rather well now.

Few pictures.

The bike.


My lovely converse after the crash. You can see that the laces were just shredded off, it was as if somebody just run a knife up one side of them and cut them.


Picture of my ankle a few days after the crash.
Thought id post it as a link incase anybody would rather not see it, although its really not that bad.


Eitherways i've definitly learnt from this and since that crash i've not had another one on that bike, and i've been out in much worse weather.

Quote from el pibe :

by bike, i meant pushbike. i'm pretty sure it's legal to use em on the sidewalk

Quote :

492.1. In no case may the driver of a motorcycle or moped or a person riding a bicycle drive or ride on a sidewalk except where necessary or where so directed by a sign.

1987, c. 94, s. 64.

Says the copy of the Québec Highway Safety Code I found online.
Though I must say, "were necessary" does kind of render it useless.

ive done it since i moved to canada ( roughly 7 years and 1/4 ) and never got fined. i've even passed BESIDE some policemen(woman) and never got '' a temporary ban ''. i even ride without a helmet so i guess i am really really lucky...

The only kind of accident I've had while driving was when I went up the road to get some petrols for my car to eat. It was dark and very wet, the petrol station is only a couple of streets away from my house so I just wanted to get up there, feed my car the petrols, and get home as fast as possible. I didn't break any speed limits because of the weather, and my car was ill at the time, suffering from a broken switch on the dash that meant my heater didn't work properly which created issues with misted up windows, and my speedo didn't always work.

On my way back the misting up became a slight issue, as did the speedo not working. The combination of those two things caused me to misjudge both my speed and entry to a right turn, the oncoming car with fog lights on didn't help either to be honest and I ended up mounting a high curb at about 15mph. Luckily I just missed a lamppost and got back on the road okay. Somehow the only damage was a scuff on my alloy and there was no damage to the tyre sidewall or suspension.

I've never had a crash. I've been in a few (too many to mention) but I was never the driver.

I'm pretty careful and courteous on the roads. Even empty roads late at night I'm never tempted to drive like a dickhead. To be honest I enjoy the peace more than anything (traffic in York is usually a total grind).

Quote from ATC Quicksilver :

I ended up mounting a high curb at about 15mph.

I saw a guy do that in a seat ibiza once, he hit it at roughly the same speed and it totally wrecked it, he hit against the kerb on a part of the wheel where there wasn't a spoke (5 spokes) and it snapped the rim, bent the steering arm, and bent the suspension arm, putting the wheel against the bulkhead, twas totally buggered.

The worst part being that this was in a car park with one of these at the entrance...



No recovery vehicle could get into the car park to rescue his motor, so a lad in a sierra cossie ended up having to put a chain around the rear axle beam and had to literally drag his car out of the car park so it could be picked up.

he was gutted, because he was showing off and trying to do a handbrake turn when he crashed, noob!

Quote from danthebangerboy :

he was gutted, because he was showing off and trying to do a handbrake turn when he crashed, noob!

Didnt he learn anything from Topgear? Handbrake turn's do not impress girls!

Not really an accident, but...

I had my drivers license not longer than year, when i was told to pick up my sister arriving from a distant city in midnight. I had LFS race that day, so i was in a hurry. I wasn't really speeding, but i was caught by police for routine check. They asked me for my drivers license, papers etc. It was also my "first time" being "caught", so stressed and in a hurry, i picked first card i found in my wallet and gave it to the policemen. He looked at the card, then at his colleague and asked me to get out of the car. I had to walk the line, following an alcohol test, which took some extra time. Everything without problem, so he asked me, why i gave him my insurance company card... They are exactly the same size as drivers license in CZ is, so i haven't noticed, i gave him the wrong card.

One of the funniest things I've ever seen was where I used to work, in a small office, we had a gravel car park next-door with the spaces marked out by wooden posts driven into the ground so the top 6 inches or so was poking out.

As the car park was mostly deserted and had a gravel surface you used to occasionally get groups of lads dicking about in cars there. On one such occasion, they handbrake turned the car and it slid into one of these wooden posts, which went under the car. They tried to drive away but found that the post, while it was short enough to get under the car, it was just tall enough to lift the wheels so they just spun.

They spent about 2 hours trying to move the car, which mostly involved alternately standing around, arguing with themselves, and getting in and spinning the wheels some more, while we occasionally cheered out the window and made sure they knew what dicks they looked. They eventually called a tow truck, which as it pulled the car off the post, obviously broke something as it left a big oil slick as it dragged the car away, to more cheering from us.

Quote from Crashgate3 :

haha, so buried under a Tesco somewhere is your crashed dumper truck?

Quote from Jakg :

You certainly sound like a bit of a cock.

A certain person here always seems to be the first to mention the **** word.

Quote from danthebangerboy :

...with one of these at the entrance...

Donkey.

Quote from Crashgate3 :

...a big oil slick as it dragged the car away, to more cheering from us.

Oil is a bastard to clean up

Around this time last year I accidentally one of thesup my nostrel, my nose and face. Buckets of internal bleeding for hours and scabs for a dozen weeks or so. DO NOT test outdoor christmas tree lights whilst co-worker has an electrical tester sticking out of the breast pocket of his coat. For real.

Quote from danthebangerboy :

I saw a guy do that in a seat ibiza once, he hit it at roughly the same speed and it totally wrecked it, he hit against the kerb on a part of the wheel where there wasn't a spoke (5 spokes) and it snapped the rim, bent the steering arm, and bent the suspension arm, putting the wheel against the bulkhead, twas totally buggered.

That's why I don't drive a spanish shitbox Seat. Oh yeh a friend of mine recently mounted a curb in her Seat Ibiza at about 25mph while trying to shout abuse at a friend she just dropped off, bent the steering arm but not too badly, it was still hilarious because I always rag on her for buying a Seat in the first place.

Quote from dougie-lampkin :

..

And to think for the past 2 years I've thought you were a vaguely sensible person