What went through my mind is quite strange.
I remember thinking "this is going to be close" as she turned.
I recall thinking "now I have to limit the damage"
I remember the wheels locking up, and trying to cadence brake to slow even on the grass with three wheels. And turning the steering to try to turn away from the barrier, but not too much as didn't want to promote understeer.
I remember thinking of my ex-team mate, who had a similar crash earlier in the year, and realising how he must have felt.
I remembered my last crash at Oulton and what damage was done.
I don't remember tensing up, or being scared.
The actual impact wasn't in slow motion. It just happened in an instant, and suddenly all was quiet. I switched off the ignition and climbed out, wondering if I should set the fire extinguisher off.
I don't think any piss came out. Not even a little bit!
All of that happened in about 2 seconds, and there were other feelings and emotions that I don't know how to put into words too.
It didn't really sink in what had happened for several hours. Other drivers said I must have been in shock at the rate I was babbling about it.
Anyway, the pile of bits won't get fixed or replaced by talking about blame or hindsight or anything else. Most people who like racing seem to think it wasn't my fault. Most people who don't like racing seem to think it was. Some exceptions to the above, and some are sticking with 50:50 or racing incident. Either way, I have a squashed car.