Been on server with OP. He uses wheel, but has a "on and off" throttle style and a very understeery 'pushy' set. Gave him 2 fast sets to try, both capable of 1:11s but OP refered to them as slidey.
He uses a set with the handling almost like the default (scrubs wide when turning with throttle ON).
@OP having seen your driving style and set I'd say your greatest flaw is your driving style. To be quick you have to change it because you can adapt to a fast set to make you quick, but you shouldn't be adapting the set to your style to make it easier. That makes you slower.
Slidey sets are always quicker, imo, sadly. You have to get used to four wheel drifts, oversteer, neutral steering in apex. You also have to carry your braking into corners a touch more, to pitch the weight transfer to the front tires. You also have to apply your throttle mote gradually out of corners, and reduce steering angle as you do so. Plenty of stuff you need to change, that a blazingly fast set cannot do. Hope you take this advice.
Remember, the FBM isn't a BF1 or a F1 2017 car. It isn't point and squirt. You have to man handle the car initially when adapting but after a while you'll realise it takes a lot to string a lap.
Cheers