IMO, if you don't feel like racing, get out of your house a bit and have a cup of joe with someone.
If you feel like chatting, IRC, IM and chat rooms are great.
The only time I join those servers it to outrun cops with FZ5's with my stock UF1.
Also, I know people dislike drifters, for some weird reason, but at least they are doing something that requires skill. To top it off, a drift server doesn't prevent me from grip racing there. Many times, people will join you in the race. You can't do that in InSim cruise servers.