A tip:
When using characters, then use them to guide the viewer towards interest point(s), or neutralize how they appear (for example by having them look towards the camera).
One girl is looking inside of car (good/ok), while 3 are looking off screen. That increases curiosity about whats going on off screen, and not in it - not really what you want
Exactly the same as when a person is standing on the street and stares up at the sky - sooner or later ppl will start looking too.. it's in our nature