It just means you have 140 years of suffering. I envy those people who end up dying at like 20 or stuff... becuase then they only had to deal with 20 years of suffering, rather than the normal 80 or so.
It just means you have 140 years of suffering. I envy those people who end up dying at like 20 or stuff... becuase then they only had to deal with 20 years of suffering, rather than the normal 80 or so.
LOL, this is you W4H
awwwwwww! poor lil fella!
awwwwwww! poor lil fella!
W4H, do any of these descriptions apply to you?
1. You're thinking this is the time to choose your path in life -- who to love, what studies, which career, etc. -- but you're afraid to make a choice. You feel you will get only one chance, so you choice needs to be perfect, and there's no compass telling you which way is best.
2. The path had been set out for you, either by your parents or by society as whole, but lately that has started to feel wrong.
If you are wondering about that, then perhaps it's best to not go looking for a GF. But my answer to that would be: For company. Really, really good company that may/will turn out to be love.
1. You're thinking this is the time to choose your path in life -- who to love, what studies, which career, etc. -- but you're afraid to make a choice. You feel you will get only one chance, so you choice needs to be perfect, and there's no compass telling you which way is best.
2. The path had been set out for you, either by your parents or by society as whole, but lately that has started to feel wrong.
If you are wondering about that, then perhaps it's best to not go looking for a GF. But my answer to that would be: For company. Really, really good company that may/will turn out to be love.
Life for me has been an up and down tale, it's well documented here that I struggled with my sexuality as a youngster, did a lot of drugs, my life followes cycles of high ups and very low downs, I have previously suffered psychosis and paranoia, and spent most of my formative years avoiding relationships both from my confusion over my sexuality and because the first woman I loved died in horrible circumstances. There is some stuff i've never spoken about on these forums, and probably never will, but suffice to say i've been in an aweful lot of trouble.
These days i'm relatively stable, have been in my current relationship now for nearly 10 months, i've a good home and a nice lifestyle. I've made a life for myself where I am able to express myself and both make the most of my positive energies and to express and control my negative aspects.
I've created an existence where I can fully express my creativity, and where I can get the support and compassion of loved ones when I need it.
Understanding yourself enables you to create and shape the environment around you to make the best of your life.
When it comes to partners getting a partner is easy - firstly, looking for another half never works, just go about your life and opportunities will arise naturally - when they do, for all you're worth take them! Chatting someone up is easy, just be yourself. Most people are fundamentally insecure and quite narccissistic, going in with a pitch that panders to these two generic qualities whilst not forgetting to express who I am pretty much guarantees that when I meet a single person and I want them - I can have them... It really has proven to be that simple.
When you are feeling good about life things naturally fall into place. I tend to live my life pretty close to the wire, I forget about things until the last moment, I hopelessly overspend and get myself in a right muddle, but these things never stress me. I've never seen the point about getting stressed over things you can't change.
If i'm late i'm late for something then i'm late for something and that's it, I don't wear a watch because if I had one i'd be forever looking at it stressing about how late I am. That's a conscious decision, I get bought watches sometimes as presents that i've never worn - people say "oh Becky doesnt have a watch does she...". Some things people just expect to be the norm, but you dont have to adhere to any one elses norm.
Understand yourself, be yourself, and the rest just sort of works itself out.
These days i'm relatively stable, have been in my current relationship now for nearly 10 months, i've a good home and a nice lifestyle. I've made a life for myself where I am able to express myself and both make the most of my positive energies and to express and control my negative aspects.
I've created an existence where I can fully express my creativity, and where I can get the support and compassion of loved ones when I need it.
Understanding yourself enables you to create and shape the environment around you to make the best of your life.
When it comes to partners getting a partner is easy - firstly, looking for another half never works, just go about your life and opportunities will arise naturally - when they do, for all you're worth take them! Chatting someone up is easy, just be yourself. Most people are fundamentally insecure and quite narccissistic, going in with a pitch that panders to these two generic qualities whilst not forgetting to express who I am pretty much guarantees that when I meet a single person and I want them - I can have them... It really has proven to be that simple.
When you are feeling good about life things naturally fall into place. I tend to live my life pretty close to the wire, I forget about things until the last moment, I hopelessly overspend and get myself in a right muddle, but these things never stress me. I've never seen the point about getting stressed over things you can't change.
If i'm late i'm late for something then i'm late for something and that's it, I don't wear a watch because if I had one i'd be forever looking at it stressing about how late I am. That's a conscious decision, I get bought watches sometimes as presents that i've never worn - people say "oh Becky doesnt have a watch does she...". Some things people just expect to be the norm, but you dont have to adhere to any one elses norm.
Understand yourself, be yourself, and the rest just sort of works itself out.
Becky you should get yourself a job as a sociologist, psychologist, Politician, after dinner speaker and if you can squeeze it in an author and journalist. May I ask how old you are? You seem to have had more experience than most and are in no doubt very intelligent person 
.
.Most days I think about killing myself. I don't tell anybody about it because the last time I did (about ten years ago) my GP put me on pills when I told him I didn't want pills. But yeah, I think I was just born to be miserable, I don't think anything will make me happy.
That's just how it is for some people.
That's just how it is for some people.
*Calls Kevs doctor*
Nah Kev... It's become my general theory on life too, except some things CAN make me happy, just few and far in between.
Maybe I'll start doing drugs, take my mind off of everything.
Too many things in life bring us down.
Crashing out with friends solves all that. To me they are the most important things in the world.
Crashing out with friends solves all that. To me they are the most important things in the world.
Don't kill yourself, this forum needs you.
Oh and as for the pills, if you had high blood pressure would you take pills? if you had a headache would you take pills? if you had angina would take pills? If you had depression would you take pills? If you broke your legs would you visit a doctor.
Seems appropriate here
I can't remember what these pills were, but I took the first dose, they made me go numb and fall asleep. It reminded me of taking smack so I never took them again.
I think that's a pretty fair reaction, personally.
Kev... send me those pills!
uh lesbian pick up artistry... tell me more
i think its genetic if youre british
Wha lolz !? I'm far too narcissistic to listen to other people crap all day, i'd rather just be a nerdy computer programmer as i'm happy with that and my lifestyle, my free time that I dont waste on these forums is spent either being sociable or doing something creative - never vegitating or watching telly, so maybe one day an author - but not the other stuff.
Oh look, there I am talking about me again, which also partly answers Shotglass' post, add some of your own personality, a corny chat up line, some jokes and a bit of positive reinforcement and job done.
Get up, get out, get off your PC, get a girl, get a job - get a life (in the nicest possible way - i've realised that i've wasted my childhood and my teens).
Dammit, I thought I had cured you
Anyway, now you guys make me feel weird, those last two pages were just really effed up
Seems like we should rename this forum: "The 'hewo my name is' circle". Hewo! My name is Boost! QQ!
Jakg, for someone that has the usual teenage issues you are of course correct. For people that are seriously depressed that 'you need a kick up the arse' approach does not work, infact it makes things worse for them. Likey 90% of the time they are feeling like shit and the other 10% of the time they feeling guilty about feeling like shit.
I have known people that even a simple task like going for a shower is a complete nightmare for them due to depression.
Yup that's me too
Can't decide fully between two careers, veterinary or software dev, and keep switching subjects at school as I change my mind. Thought I had fully commited to software dev, but after doing a week's work experience at vet clinic last week I now want to do veterinary again. Which leaves me hopelessly confused as to which to do, as I enjoy both, and I seem to have some sort of talent at both.I'm also in the incredibly empty category...I seem to be socially inept when talking to real people for some reason. Like, Thursday, when I was on work experience, I was alone, with a cute girl, for an hour, in the canteen. I talked about the freakin weather. There was long protracted silences every 30 seconds, then I'd talk more about the weather. I couldn't change the topic no matter what I tried. And then she just gave me a funny look, and I left the room and ate outside.
I was with no less than 3 vets on a one-to-one basis over the week, for a whole day each, on the road. I couldn't do more than nod or mumble
I always thought that in large groups I failed at talking, where it doesn't matter, as no-one notices, but now it's happening to me even one on one. I just can't get out of this mess. I tried starting a conversation, but then after me saying something, and the other person saying something, I've run out of things to say, and end up agreeing or laughing. Nothing I try seems to help, I've tried being more socially active, which ended up with half my school thinking I'm now a complete tool, and I've tried hiding away, which only made things even worse.I have virtually 0 chance of getting a girlfriend, which would pretty much solve my problems (having someone to confide in, socialise with, someone who understands me, someone who I can relate to, etc.). About 90% of my friends are male (as much as I'm sure it doesn't look like it, I am actually straight. I have had a girlfriend before, but she moved house
), and I go to an all-boys school. There is a girls school next door, but they're a pile of skangers and I seriously wouldn't touch them. It's not just me, I don't think anybody in my school would touch them. Most of the girls I've known from primary school have moved on, gone to different schools (obviously :razz, etc. So now I end up coming home from school, doing the bare minimum of homework plus a bit of study, then spending the rest of the night, which could be anything up to 8 hours, on the PC, doing nothing productive at all, a few games, and the rest forum whoring or just browsing /b/. And this is every day. Same on weekends. For god's sake, I've just spent my entire mid-term break on work experience, and my initial thought was not "Oh no, I won't have any time to go hang out with friends", no, it was "Oh no, I'm missing out on valuable sleep time"...The last time I actually went out with friends was 5 weeks ago, at my friends birthday party. And I had to be persuaded to come along...
Getting ****ing diabetes earlier this year certainly hasn't helped, now I've a list of things I can't do as a profession, I can't touch alcohol unless I'm having a meal, I can't take in any sugar and I have to stab myself every day. I was feeling pretty bad when I was diagnosed, and looking back it's a wonder it didn't throw me over the edge. Feeling like crap, plus being told that I have a life-long terminal illness is just marvellous...
I'm pretty sure it is depression, but I can't tell my parents, as I'll just be ridiculed and told it's not a real problem, and to man up. And I pretty much have no friends to confide in, which is part of the problem. And I have no way to privately talk to a doctor about it, as I've no way of getting there in the first place. So I end up listening to music most of the time, which works temporarily, and leaves me relaxed, but then I just get another wave of depression and feel like shit for the rest of the day/week.
As Alien says, 90% of the time I just feel terrible, and the other 10% I feel terrible for feeling like that, as I see that some people do make an effort towards me, but I'm too busy feeling sorry for myself to give a shit. Actually, as you mention the shower thing, I used to dread taking a shower amongst other things, for whatever reason. I have no idea why, but it's past me now.
Don't even know why I'm posting this...I thought it might make me feel a bit better, knowing that someone will actually read how I am, but it doesn't. So I just don't know what to do
I don't think there is any one thing I can do, but I wish I could start over, and not be such a pillock. It's too late now, but a couple of years ago, if I'd decided to socialise a bit rather than stay at home all the time, I wouldn't be in this mess...I now have no-one to talk to, no-one to confide in and no-one to really have fun with. It's such a catch situation, the only way to become socially confident is by talking to others, but I can't as I'm a social retard. Sigh...im almost just like you... well its a teen thing i guess
It could be worse mate, you could be Irish as well
In all seriousness I can imagine that just typing what you have has made you feel slightly better about things. I believe males have a harder time in dealing with emotions than females. You can't speak to your friends as you'll get ridiculed etc. You are not a social retard either, OK you may feel like one but I can assure you that you aren't. I've seen many of your posts in this forum for a start.
Your parents sending you to an all boys school is not on in my opinion, but ah well it is their decision, or is it? When you eventually go to University or traveling or whatever I can imagine your life will change dramatically and in a few years you will look back on this time and have a giggle to yourself. As for career choice, do you really have to decide right now? I think not!
I am not a psychologist in any way shape or form, so unfortunately I can give very little advice too you or anyone else, except that if things are that bad you have to take time to go and speak to someone, it's amazing how helpful blurting things out to a complete stranger who is willing to listen can be.
Good luck
Today I had something to do, because I decided to make a trailer for RoR. I didn't at any point feel bored because I was using my brain for something useful. Now I just have to make a mesh for it.
Thanks for the reply
I have no problem talking when I'm not face-to-face, and I have time to think about what to say. So I'm fine on t'interwebs or texting. But when I'm actually talking to someone, I just get a fit of panic that I can't think of anything to say, and then I can't, and I'll either end up smiling and nodding or else yapping about something completely irrelevant. Some people don't seem to mind this, but others find it downright creepy and just avoid me. Doesn't help matters
And of course, as you say, "men don't have feelings"...But if I had a lady friend who I could actually trust with these things, it wouldn't be a problem...The all boys school isn't anyone's fault, there's two co-ed schools in my city, and one is impossible to get into unless you have right of entry, and the other is just for wasters. I'm not complaining about the school I'm in, it's an OK school. It's just I don't get to talk to the opposite sex on a regular basis
As for the career choice, they require two different subject lines, and we were supposed to choose our line last year. I had decided to do veterinary, and picked that line, but then I wanted to do deving, and switched to that line. Now I want to do veterinary again, but I'd doubt I'll be allowed to switch again, especially after such a long time. Not being allowed to choose my own path in life as I see fit is kind of a downer, but there's nothing I can do...I do sometimes tell that entire story to people, and I get plenty of reassurance and feel good afterwards. But it's always short-lived and only lasts a few days. I feel good when I'm around certain people too, even if I don't necessarily fancy them. They just give off happy vibes or something
But of course, I can't follow them around all day 
And now I'm ranting again, sorry
E: Same thing here W4H, if I find something practical to do, whether it be working on my bike, fixing my PC, whatever, it takes my mind off it. Heh, I need a hobby
It's okay, everyone in this thread is ranting.
Working on your bike/PC is a hobby.
err...you are literate and has a computer, you live in a reasonably safe country and you think you are suffering?
go see what real suffering is like.
im the same way with that i can't talk face to face at all really.. im shy as hell can't ask a girl out cause im scared too...
Feeling of emptyness
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