Umm, perhaps you need to watch some of Little Britain to understand

OK...I know that this is a rather large bump, but it is preferable to starting a new thread.

I was listening to a book review on 5 Live yesterday, and the subject was a list of pet hates regarding the bastardization of the English Language.
This threw up a few gems that I just HAVE to share with you.

A letter from a parent explaining why her son wasn't at school:

Dear *******,
Johnny didnt come to school yesterday because he had DIRE REAR
(diarrhea)!!!

A child asked to spell the word "Hedgehog": EGOG

There were more, but have any amongst you heard of any more good ones?

Ooh my sister has lots of good ones - can't remember many atm . Spoken, admittedly, not written:

Beyoncé aid
and my current favourite:

Apparently, the next US president is called:



Barry Kobama