I haven't bothered with an excuse at work as we have a pretty relaxed policy (within reason). However, I do recall one time in the ninth grade a couple friends of mine were late for math class. When asked why they were late, one of them said "Menstrual cramps." The other said "I was helping him."

... Both friends are male. The teacher accepted that excuse.

I felt myself bad.

Its my first day

I was playing LFS/On LFS forums. Oh wait...

"The voices told me to stay at home and polish all my guns."

- I'll be a bit late this morning as I need to pop round to your wife for a minute

Sorry boss, the train I took had a flat tyre

i have used these

Me saying to my boss hey mate sorry im late but YOUR GAY.


Me: hey sorry i have a problem with my eyes i just cant see my self comming to work today...


I allso said to my boss i was broken down 70ks from home at 3am after railing a girl and thats why i was late

''zipper was stuck'' pretty common tho

Quote from polepositiondriver :

My best one so far has been that my car broke down, its my best one because i've used it once a month LOL

They must think my cars a piece of crap (never broken down once)

Whats your best excuse

That's a good one. Maybe they will give you a company car

my brother has got some ridiculous ones on his not-so-sober homepage... here are a few:

-Scotty beamed me to the wrong place initially
-My car is broken, so I had to push it all the way to here. (edit: note that he didn't say that his car broke down...could have been broken for a month)
-Yesterday my girl handcuffed me to the bed and forgot to get me off again
-Sorry, I had to intensively prepare for todays excuse!

greetz

der butz

Quote from polepositiondriver :

LOL how is this mentioned to them?

"hi boss, I got killed earlier today so I won't be in, see you on monday" LOL

Exactly.

Just say. 'Hi Boss, got Killed the otherday so unfortunately I can't make the meeting, no worries though. i'm being re incarnated as myself in the next few days'

Im not late, I'm early for tomorrow.

best one i recall was a guy from my history class. He came in late and said, "Sorry, had to drive slow because of the icy roads." Teacher accepted it, even tho it was July

Or something like "my cat gave birth this morning and i had to assist."

Quote from P5YcHoM4N :

To that most companies would just say "you should know what traffic is like, so you should have planned extra time to get here"



That was used a lot by lectures at college and university.

well i pulled it out of my rear so yeah...

My dog ate my...err...car?

Quote from amp88 :

My dog ate my...err...car?

my dog ate my keys so i had to take him to the vet while my dog tripped b**** thinking he's john lennon in space...
[

What...

no, thats sugar, messy cup of coffee on the way here...


sniffed some by accident...

is that jesus floating by..


*note * Actually worked... God loves hung over people.

Sorry, had to yell at someone because their sweater was hideous.

Well the best written excuses I've seen are "I have not come to work on monday because I thought I did" and "I have been drinking hot tea, when I drank a liter of it, I couldn't hold it in, had an unvoluntary wee, and burned by legs"

I dont KNOW any excuses for being late for work....because in the last 8 years I have only been late twice...once when the stretch of road I happened to be on at the time got closed by the police because of an RTA (a quick phone call to the boss, they knew all about it...no problemo!) and the other was when I got involved in an RTA when some stupid b***h (a female driver ) decided to rear-end me at the traffic lights...again, quick phone call and I didnt even lose any pay over it.
Considering that my start times vary between 0320 am at the earliest and 1650 (4.50 pm) at the latest..with just about everything in between!... I think that is a pretty good record.
Best excuse? dont be late!

"Sorry, I was doing some hotlaps at Blackwood GP. But I drove no WR because of this stupid f***ing work!!!"

sorry, morning dump took longer than expected..

I only have to make excuses when I'm on time.

Quote from Osco :

sorry, morning dump took longer than expected..

Hah! Good one. No excuse if there's a loo at work though. :hide:

true, but unless there's a shower too, no way I'm taking a crap at (my former) workplace.
poo --> shower
the only way you feel really clean :hide: