Quote from BlakjeKaas :

She: "What's pie?"
He: "3.14...?"
She: "it's 3!"
He: "why?"
She: "it's round."

I'm speechless.

Here's another one: What do you call a slow hurricane? A slowicane.

Quote from mrodgers :

A Sad, but Heartwarming Tale.........

that is just so wrong.....

Where did the Stallion go when he became sick?
To the Horsepital

What do 90% of americans say before they wreck? OH SHIT! OK Now what do the other 10% say...............................................they say hold my beer honey youre gonna love this

and

Q. what is the medical term for ’lesbian’?

A. strapadicktome

was having sex with the misses the other night...

asked her to moan...


she hasnt stopped all week

another one :

two eskimos meet when walking across a feild, ones says to the other...


Your cool


* self knife rapes *

Quote from LFSn00b :

Did you hear about a guy who got hit by a soda can? He was lucky it was a soft drink.

:doh: Thats really bad

Quote from G!NhO :

What do 90% of americans say before they wreck? OH SHIT! OK Now what do the other 10% say...............................................they say hold my beer honey youre gonna love this

I'm american and I find this very offensive.........

It's 10% of us that say "OH SHIT!" and 90% that say "hold my beer....."

What is the best birthday present ever?

A broken drum. You can't beat it.



This one is really offensive. Read with care.

John Travolta's son died in the early hours of Friday.

Doctors have ruled out Saturday night fever.

Quote from mrodgers :

I'm american and I find this very offensive.........

It's 10% of us that say "OH SHIT!" and 90% that say "hold my beer....."

haha even better

Quote from Highsider9 :

What is the best birthday present ever?

A broken drum. You can't beat it.

This one is really good
I didn't read the other one though.

my grand mother once gave me 10 $ and told me not to tell anyone...





i said:



its gonna cost you more then that

Quote from Highsider9 :

This one is really offensive. Read with care.

OMG That one was seriously funny

But i feel sorry for Travolta..

There are 3 kinds of people.
Those that can count, and those that can't.

Quote from J@tko :

There are 3 kinds of people.
Those that can count, and those that can't.

that made me giggle.

nice 1

Quote from Dennis93 :

that made me giggle.

nice 1

It didn't make me giggle - thats why I posted it!

i was at an ATM the other night and an old lady asked me to check her balance for her.


so i pushed her over.


what do you get hanging from an apple tree?

sore arms of course.


edit: just in case........highlight it harjun.

1st one was decent, 2nd was just like, logical ^^
keep me amused!

A pub landlord is shutting up for the night when there is a knock at the door. When he answers, a Tramp asks him for a toothpick. He gives him the toothpick and the tramp leaves.

A few minutes later there is a second knock. When he answers, there is a second Tramp who also asks for a toothpick. He gets his toothpick and off he goes.

There is a third knock at the door, and a third Tramp. The landlord says, "Don't tell me, you want a toothpick too."

"No, a straw," says the Tramp.

The landlord gives him a straw but is curious as to why he wants it, so he asks the Tramp why he wants a straw and not a toothpick.

To which the Tramp replies, "Some bloke just threw up outside but all the good stuff's gone already".

*Warning, these jokes are immensely bad in taste - please do not read if you're easily offended or likely to complain!*

What do you call 30 black men running down a hill?

JAILBREAK!!

Whats the similarity between Madeline McCann and a Submarine?

They're both 40 feet under and full of seamen.

Paddy and Terry are walking home from the pub.

Paddy suddenly falls into a hole left by roadworkers and breaks his leg.

In agony, Paddy shouts up to Terry, "Terry! Terry! I've broken me bloody leg! Call me an ambulance!"

Terry, with no sign of concern on his face, leans over the edge, spots Paddy's broken leg and mumbles "Paddy, you're an ambulance".

Well I didn't uderstood that one but I am in the bad jokes thread so that one rulz!!!!11


So this pale, medium sized man walks into a bar and orders a drink. A few minutes pass and a nice, young, blonde lass sits down next to him. She looks at him wonderring why he's so pale. A few minutes pass and she's still wonderring why he's pale. She's still wonderring up untill this day why he was pale

Quote from J@tko :

There are 3 kinds of people.
Those that can count, and those that can't.

That one's better, I rank it as bad because you can't tell it and make ordinary people laugh:

There are only 10 kinds of people in the world:
Those who know binary and those who don't.

Quote from ColeusRattus :

There are only 10 kinds of people in the world:
Those who know binary and those who don't.

OMG I was literally about to post that now! NUUB!!!

Two blondes walk into a building.......... you'd think at least
one of them would have seen it

Two homeless chatting:
A: oh man I found so hot chick last night in the street behind the hotel, I did everything with her - doggystyle, anal
B: what about blowjob?
A:I couldn't find the head