Just noticed that Honey is Italian . . . Hmmmmm.

Ciao Bella. Come Sta?

Mia molta caldo pour vu . . . . or something.

Ciao.

Bueno Notte. Sogni d'oro.

Erm.

Mate. I got shit loads where that came from. God knows how many words I got on my harddrive. Maybe I should start a blog or something.

-edit- So. Me and the magnets daughter! Wanna hear?

Bear in mind I'm making this up on the fly so it ain't gunna be all that . . . .

That comedian bloke . . You know the one . . thingy . .whatsisname . . Forces sweetheart . . . Does Sincerella. God, I can picture him in my head . . . .names on the tip of my toungue . . . JIM DAVIDSON . . . HAHA.

He got done by so many times by cameras on the M4 that he used double jeapoardy in court to try and get him off. Saying that it was the same journey and that he was speeding the entire time, so how can he get done for the same crime over and over again.

The courts didnt' buy it and took his licence away.

Quote from Captain Slow :

whey aye!!

lets hear it. i need something to ammuse me.

Weeeellllll.

There I was. Minding my own business. you know, window down, stereo up, fag in hand, arm hanging out, G/F in the passenger seat, the hyper drive just ticking over. When I thought, hell. I've just had that new NOXious-gas kit fitted and I hadn't really had a chance to try it out yet. I thought that this would impress the new missus. So, I find myself an empty bit of interstellar highway knowing f'shaw that there ain't no cops around. Not at this time of orbit anyway. So I wind up the window, stub out the fag, turn down the stereo (Bat out of Hell, Meatloaf. Good track.), warn the bird and wind up the 'drive. Got 'er going striaght and level and WHAM!!! The Nox slammed in. Man, you've never seen a VX Nova class sub-light move sooooo fast. MAN!!! I shit a brick. I was gripping that joystick so tight that my knuckles turned white. When, all of a sudden there was three, no four, make that six cops on my tail. They must have been hiding behind that advert on the asteroid. You know the one, just past Object 663-994z9alpha. The Coca Cola one. They must have been sat there just waiting for me. Must have seen my Ion trail a mile off. there was nothing I could do. I must have been pulling over 1,000,000 ton when I past them. there was no way I could get this bitch slowed down to the limit. So I thought, F'k it. At this speed I should be round Neptune and going for the sling shot round Pluto before they could even get a lock. I was thinking then, if I nipped through the mining complex, hugged the gravity fields and blatted down the back lane's I should get an inverted reflux before they could get a bead on me.

But oh no. They must have all been having a convention or something. It was police central out there. There was me, shouting at the bird "why are they out here. Havn't they got any real criminals to catch?" and me bird was shouting at me "You b'stard. Your gunna get me killed. Wait till I tell our Dor about this. She's gunna have your gut's for garters".

"Your Dor. Thats the least of my worries your stupid bint. If I get caught I've got six years no remarnd and we're still 50 AU's from home."

At which point I kinda lost it. I rammed that Nox to the max. Everything was screaming at me. My Bird, my Ride, me . . . Things where going pop, things where blowing smoke and that was just the bird. But by christ I did it. I out ran six . . . . . ty of the interstellar corps coppers finest Blues and Two's with a simple VX Nova class Frig.

Although I will let you into a little secret. My mate once told me that they don't like going to deep into Jupiters Magnetic field right. B'cause they don't get the sick pay for all the 'rad exposure. So I ducked in right. Past Io, through the Aurora and into the clouds. Didn't go too far cause this 'ol boat 'o' mine don't like gravity. But just enough to shake the Roz. Doc only reckons it's taken 'bout six years off me. Fair deal for out running the Cops though.

Bird left me. Said six years or not she ain't wasting anymore with me. Sold the Nova too. Got a bird up the duff on Europa whilst 'avin a good night out with the lads. She's dun me for money so I've had to trade in the Nos for something slightly more sedate. A Ford Galaxy Class big bus of a people carrier. Couldn't pull the gas from a nebulae. Damn thing.

So there you go. My brush with law. Take my advice, stay the right side of it and don't get a bird up the duff . . .

Which reminds me of the time when I absconded with the daughter of a powerful mining magnet. he had the entire solar system out looking for us . . .


But that's another story.

Quote from faster111 :

Next big update for warrock is 3 more days there be new map new wepons and other new stuff this every good game.Ans i found out that they update warrock every month.

If you are trying to sell a game. And please feel free to burn me for this. I am after all going straight to the ninth dimension of Hell anyway. But shouldn't you at least try and let people read correct english. Particularily if the flag you are flying is the good 'ol Union Jack. I wouldn't go near your game just on the sheer dint of really poor syntax.

I know I ain't all that hot but this is after all netspeak but when you are trying to palm off you wares at least try and make an effort. It really does get noticed.

Mate. Work is a bit of an issue atm to be honest . . .

But currently I am sat doing stage door of the theatre that I work in (Predominatly as stage crew, flyman, rigger and stuff). It's a no work job (Watch car park and open the door to snotty nosed actors) and not what I do normally (Which is slightly more labour intensive) but it does mean I get to sit on my arse, use the computer and wax lyrical about anything I want.

It won't last for long 'cause I got me a new job which is going to be well full on. Although it doesn't involve Travelling the outer reaches of the solar system. Whcih reminds me, does anyone wanna here about my brush with the Interstella patrol? It's a good story.

Which is what life is all about . . everyone needs a good story or two.

Harsh . . .fair. But harsh.

In factI am at work. hence the rather long and protracted posts . . .

Do you know one? Been looking for ages . . .

Quote from Greboth :

Lock their lfs accounts to only uf1 and so they cant enter uf1 races so they have to race against faster cars. Also make a skin saying "cheater" all over it

You know what . . . they probs ain't such a bad idea.

You have to upload your skin right . . so therefore the central (sic) server has a copy of that skin so everyone can see it. Sooooo, a cheater is found out and a replacement skin is shown. One that will have CHEATER!! emblazoned across it . . . Can't be so hard to do . . .

Plus, what happens in RL . . You get clamped. Cheaters get their cars clamped. So they can't exit and re-login and they can't drive. And a big yellow clamp is placed on their wheel so everyone can see. A cyber punishment in everyway.

Or beat them with a comically shaped turnip.


Actually all things considered I think the latter has more longevity . ..

Quote from MorroW :

So after today...if I want to go and visit my parents...I might need visa or something because it's not planet any more?

Someone who's parents live futher might help me with travelling advise

Ok. You need to register with the Europan (The Jovian Moon) customs and excise at which point they will ask you for sixteen different Identification points . . you know the sort . . . Photo, DNA, fingerprints, tenticle prints, how many brains, Number of offspring, home address, recent library books taken out and a financial check through the gestalt banks of Io. (Beware that last one, don't get a check and they come down on you like a dwarf planet. Once you've completed all the paper work in triplicate they will then lose it, bury it and compost it for three years and return it to you for a signiture by, at the very least, three upstanding and stalwart citizens of the intergalactic commenwealth (they ask for this knowing full well that you can't get three upstanding citizens anywhere in the known universe let alone within the galactic commenwealth). Once and if you manage to get your signitories then you need to pass through passport control on Calisto. And you think you had it hard so far . . . Luckily you have family our there, if you didn't I would have said turn back at Jupiter and have a ball on Mars, but as it is . . .

Firstly. Don't smile, blink, breath or even be alive around the customs officials. There is nothing they hate more than an entity showing all the classic sign of life. They hate the paperwork. Better of to play dead and travel freight. If you don't have a hibernatory metabolism or can withstand the cold of space then be prepared to 'grease' the way. These customs guys like nothing more than some good old fashioned 2 stroke oil. God knows what they do with it but it's amazing how a misplaced bottle of such can 'grease' (No pun intended) you passage through to the outer solar system.

If you can survive all of that with a modicum of good humour and health than you are more than amply prepared for the mind numbingly dull tedium of Kuiper belt space and the god awful amount of time it takes to traverse it at those rediculous low speeds that the intergalactic transport management commitee have imposed on it . . . Which brings me onto my run in with the deep space patrol and how to cope with them.

But that another story all together.

I hope that helps.

You dissing our Mags? Shame on you!! (ses he the uber liberal)

Anyway. Anyone got a topic around here? I'm sure it was something to do with Tyres and particles . . .sorry, molecules.

Me sooooo bad . . .

Good point. Like I said, everycar in LFS atm is a piece of history. And as have been so eloquently put over the past posts is that each car has something very individual to offer. LFS isn't about racing just GT's, or just Open wheelers or just FWD's. It's got everything for everyone and it simulates to such a good degree that every car is what you would expect. Even though I am a GT RWD FZR fanatic I shall still go and drive a UF1 every once in a while just because I can. UF1 races are some of the best races I've ever had. It's somehtthing you can only really appreaciate once you've got competetative and race the highter classes that what the lower powered cars give you (Apart from good learning) is honest to goodness fun. And fun is where it's at. LFS really is that good.

So we all have to sit on a bar of chocolate?

(GB joke. A Topic is a chocolate bar here in good old blighty. Got peanuts in it and everything. Although does kinda take away from the joke if you have to explain it.)

I understand you Sammy my dear nibbler boy you. I think that was very eloquently put and I whole heartedly agree. Cheaters come from within the community so, unless it is a serious esploit, coding or somesuch bug, then it is up to us to make cheating a 'bad' thing.

But having said that, it's the same with suicide bombers. If someone wants to do it, they will find a way of doing it. You can't protect everyone all of the time, it's just impossible. What you can do is minimise the risk as Sammy said, just play on protected servers that have good security measures in place, empty all your pockets before hand and don't try and take your Zippo lighter that was given to you by your daughter for fathers day (Inscribed and everything) onto the plane. Even if it is the only lighter you have on you. The guys with guns don't like it when you get a bit upety. They don't have much of a sense of humour.

But anyway, yes. We should play on well admined, well policed servers that play an intergral role in keeoing cheating to a minimum. Prehaps we should instigate an Fight Against Cheating Office (or F.A.C. Off).

It's up to us, it's up to you . . . .

Nothing like a good bout of public humiliation. Bring back the stocks I say, hang a sign on his neck and cover him in honey. Nothing like a firm hand in these matters. In my day you would have been whipped to within an inch of your life. And that was just for answering back. Aye, kids nowadays don't know how lucky they are . . . .

Got toothache. Not sleeping atm. So, nana na na naaaaaa.

OMG! is he a mod now?

I'm sorry Mr Bob the Moderator. It was all meant in good humour. Please don't take offense Mr Bob the Moderator I am truly very, humberly, crawlingly, gut achingly, fly's open over glass-ly, most appologetically sorry.

(Do think that placated him slightly?)

I don't feel there would be any good reason to retire any motors from LFS. They all make up the glorious tapestry that is the world of LFS.

Remember that just because you don't drive a certain track/car combo doesn't mean that other people don't. I was a FZR As.NAt man, as well as Kyoto but I know many people hated that 'the same as everyone else' feeling. But I can't stand the single seaters, many poeple won't hear a word said against them. That's what makes LFS the way it is, that is how good LFS is. That we can enter into a discussion about whether a car has merits or not in a way that you would never get in any other racing games/simulations.

And for the record . . . RWD got the soul and the groove with some stink thrown in for good measure and not only James Brown behind the wheel but with Howling Wolf, Stevie Wonder and the cool slippery slidy blues undertones of BB king riding shotgun.

Fwd . . . .well, thats got more of your chemical brothers, Aphex Twin, Orbital and Sneaker Pimps feel. Alright for a night out and a blast around town but most likely leave you with a headache in the morning.

AWD . . . See, no thats your safe option. Middle of the road with Dido fronting metallica. Massive attack playing backing to Def Leppard. Eric Clapton playing the lead guitar in AC/DC. It's got a bit of bark but you know it won't turn and stab you in the back. AWD is something you would take home to meet your mom.

I'm most definatly a RWD man. Mid engined preferable.

I am assuming there is a clause in the purchase agreement that states that if you are found to be cheating then all online accounts appertaining to your user name will be deleted. A further purchase would be required to activate a new account. Thus only offline play is achievable through the data already purchased . . . .

If there isn't a clause such as that one, there should be. Surely if it's part of the user purchase agreement then there is nothing that a 'cheater' can do about having the online account terminated. I think that is fair enough.

Appologise if this actually is the case, I'm useless at checking my facts. Actually, I'm not useless. I just can't be bothered half the time.

Quote from Daveigus :

as a reply to funnybear, i'am no wheel and no mouse driver.. i drive with a keyboard using WASD, i'am no race game fanatic so iam not purchasing a wheel for one game, but lfs is just soo different (in a really good way) i like the realism and the fact that its a challange just to PLAY the game, Why the setup then you ask? well.. all new players deserve an easy mode :-p..

As mentioned mate, the keyboard is not going to give best control inputs for you to handle a higher powered rear wheel drive car. Espeacially if you are considereing getting S2 and you move onto bigger and faster cars. (Which everyone will thouroughly recommend). If you have no intention of buying a wheel (Which is fair enough, there are some very fast mousers out there so a wheel is not the be all and end all) then you really should learn to use the mouse. My favoured setup was mouse buttons for acc. and decell. and the mouse for steer which left my left hand free for gear changes and any keyboard stuff that needed doing.

It will take a bit of getting used to but it really is worth the effort if you want to be able to compete with the fast guys. Let us know if you are going to make the change because there are a number of things you can do that will make mousing easier.

(If we don't get back to you if you reply and start using the mouse it's a good idea to reduce your windows mouse speed and take off any acc. in the settings. LFS takes it's mouse speed from windows, it will help no end by slowing everything down somewhat if you adjust in windows first then work things out in LFS.)

Quote from MagicMarker27 :

In your opinon, if Im running Blackwood Gp in the FZR with a lsd set at 40/60, what am I expecting? When I had it at 50/80 I could not turn easy, such as the end of the back straight. Also in that corner under braking, the car would not turn. I have run many many laps there, and have had it set at 50/80 and can turn 1:08.xx laps pretty regularly. All things being equal, including my driving, what would say 20/40 lead to? Or 70/30? Having to modulate the throttle more while exiting or accel. away from the apex? I have seen what the hotlap sets are, and can not get a handle on the locks. I know Bob always says run what makes it comfortable to drive, and I have, even understanding what subtle changes in the rebound and bumps have done for cornering grip. Is it really just a lack of experience that I cant run 1:06.xx on that track, or is it more along setups still? I also run about 9/18 on downforce. Hot laps sets are lower, but when you reduce downforce you also have to make susp changes to compensate for the reductions. Not sure what Im actually looking for for an answer, maybe more or less Im just looking to get some feedback from others that have been where Im at now, and to see where to turn to next.

Looking at that the first thing I would have said was your front downforce was a bit on the high side. Although not by much for Blackwood. I was not a huge fan of blackwood and my times there reflect that 1.08.something. What I did notice about BW GP was that first corner and chicane section before the straight. My best times always came from getting that section right, although I was always a good half second to a second of the fastest pace through there but I made up a hell of a lot of time through the back section. With the FZR and high Coast lock (Like I have mentioned before I ran coast nearly at maximum, it worked for me.) You could ram that baby into second on the approach to the first corner and it would stop on a dime and allow you great turn in whilst still engine braking, but I could never get a good exit from that because I could never get the power down well enough, I sloved that by early change to third on the exit and using thrid through the chicane. The revs would be a bit low on entry on T1 exit but they would on song just as you came out of the chicane, this meant I could keep the back end fairly tight but with the detriment of loosing a few tenths by not having second gear. But like I said, BW was not my favourite so I handn't donw a huge amount of testing there.

-A note on the second gear slammer-

I don't know if anyone one else uses it or can use it or whether it was just my driving style and setup but the second gear slammer was a great tool for a mouser to use. I could out break many pedal usersby using the technique. Maybe from the discussion here it might be an effect of the high Coast lock. For a mouser a high coast lock helps tremendously in fast braking zones by keeping the rear end controllable (At least in the FZR anyway) as does a low power on lock helps to soften the 'digital' input of the mouse somewhat. But the second gear slammer was something else entirely. It needs practice to get the timing right, but once you have it its a very useful tool. It is a classic out braking technique, not one I use for speed laps or general racing. But if you are racing someone then it's a beauty. Normally a pedal user can out brake a mouser by sheer dint of controlled pressure, but I found that softening my front suspension, letting the bounce have some play and a relativly low front tyre pressure I could get my brake force back up to normal parameters. Combine those with a high coast lock therefore relying heavily on engine braking I could quick change from 6 to 4, let the engine take the strain untill I judged I was slowing enough and then at the right point (To early you'll lock up the rear and you ruin everyones race, to late and you'll over shoot and make all the effort wasted) slam it into second, the car stops so quick that I thought it must be a handling bug. Which it could well be and with the new tyres it's even more pronounced. But it not only allowed you stop quickly but it still gave you enough control to make the bend with both a good line and good speed due to the fact that you are effectily trail braking with the engine so the front wheels are just concentrating on steering. Like I said, I'm sure this is not unususal and with the talk about the coast lock I think that might explain the behaviour, but it worked for me.

Last edited by Funnybear, Wed 23 Aug 2006, 10:55.

First question I'd have to ask is why . . . Thats a pretty unusual combination your trying there.

And the second question is (if you can't get a setup from somewhere) do you mouse or wheel?

Then possible i can give you some pointers.

[sarcasm]Molecules Bob. A partical is something considerable larger than Air molecules. Although I am sure there are some particles of dust, mites, human skin, oil and dirt rolling around inside a tyre but the air itself well, that would be made up of oxygen, hydrogen, carbon, helium amongst many others that will combine to make numerous Molecules of Carbon Dioxide, Water, Ozone, Hydrogen disulphide and lets not forget the ubiquetous O2 amongst, again, many others in differing quantaties. These are molecules, far too small to be deemed particles. And those molecules make up the consituant parts of Air.[/sarcasm]

Haaayyyyyy Thankyou.

Damn, forgot to put these in but I ain't going all the way back up there just to do it . . . .

Edit: that better Funnybear? Bob

-edit- it was meant to be part of the whole feel of the phraseoligy and flow of the piece . . . It just ain't as funny now. *Sigh* An artists life is never easy . . . .

Last edited by Funnybear, Fri 25 Aug 2006, 07:30.

And don't forget to take into account that they are to very different cars. One is a front wheel drive mini replica and the other is a RWD, front engined, turboed bugger to try and drive fast. You can't use the same techniques driving a FWD as you would use in a RWD car. Completly differenct dynamics involved. And that my friend is the the beauty of LFS.

But, a few pointers to get a RWD drive car to handle better. (I come from a mousing perspective so if you wheel then you could disregard some of them more technical aspects)

Firstly, handling. Slow in, fast out. You can't chuck a RWD car around like you can a FWD. The engine is in the front so all the wieght is at the front. The driven wheels need all the help they can get to keep traction so keep it steady. 'Feel' the car and the limit of traction you can't just put the pedal to the metal in a RWD. You need to ease the throttle and ease the car around the corners. You'll soon get it right and you'll appreaciate the driving experiance all the more for it. Prehaps if you mention whether you are a mouser or not I will help you get the best out of your driving if you use a mouse. Obvioulsy a pedal and wheel setup is less critical of throttle input.

Secondly, setup. (Obviously with a mouse you need to take other things into consideration. Again, let us now what control method you are using and we can get more in depth depending on what.) To give yourself a more stable setup is the aim here. As a beginner you want a forgiving, easy to drive set untill you get more confident and able to control RWD. As mentioned have a look at the Inferno sets (There are other's around too. I think Bob does some easy drive sets) but keep away fom the WR sets. They might seem appealing but trust me you will not be able to drive them. They have been tailor made by the WR holders and their styles and skill levels differ greatly from your own. Instead just keep it simple. I would really reccommend that you take some time to learn how to setup your own car. It may feel you don't have the time and that you'd rather be racing but setting up is as much a part of LFS as racing is. You will probable find that the better you get the more you will wan't to set up your own vehicles anyway. That way you can tailor your car to your driving. Also, by learning about how a car handles you can adjust to a RWD car easier because you understand why it handles the way it does. You should learn about wieght transfer, grip levels, dampening, ARB's and all that jazz. Because LFS really will reward you for finding out, LFS really is that good.

But you probable won't want to do that, you just want to be out there racing. So a quick fire checklist for you to look at in your setup. Actually scrap that, I need to know if you mouse or not.

Tell me that and I'll help some more.

Oh really! What a question. Landrover. There is no other.

Napolean or Wellington.

Quote from wheel4hummer :

Well, I have been thinking about what's going on. I just don't see why so many people hate Israel, and the Jews. Hezbollah is a TERRORIST ORGANIZATION. I will now stop posting in this thread, because I just don't give a sh*t anymore. I know where I stand, but I have learned to never voice my opinion over the internet. If you are so concerned with Israel "having control" over the US media, how come you are not concerned with the several hundred thousand illigal immigrants living in the US? I seriously do not understand why people hate Israel so much. I think it is because when people see a country that has more money, and new technology, they think that it is easier to attack that country. Maybe instead of becomming terrorists, the people of Hezbollah can stop the violence. Last I checked, there is no Israeli military bases in Haifa (That's where Hezbollah repeatedly targets). So, that is my last post. Goodbye, and there is no need to reply to me. I am voicing my opinion, and if you don't like it, too damn bad.

Awww. Mate. We where doing so well. We have had every nationality here including an Israely. Everyone had something pertinant and constructive to say apart from the token American. It's a shame that the stereotype has to be reinforced so convincingly. I hope that you can use youth as an escuse, if not then you really need to reasses some of your core beliefs.