They hate America in large part because of events that happened almost 100 years ago. What message does America give to the Middle East? That you shouldn't systematically kill your wives or daughters in the name of "honor"? Shouldn't all first world countries give them that message? Is the message that you should be free to decide how to live your life and who you allow to govern the people?
Honestly I'm torn about our continued involvement in the middle east. For one it is futile because no matter what, Middle Eastern politics will always be fueled by hate. It is the most simple kind of politics that dates back 2000 years or more and it is all they understand. If they can't hate America they will hate Israel. or Britain. or frickin Sweden of all places (over cartoons? seriously..). If we succeed in developing a democracy and leave, they will vote for a dictator. Its very frustrating.
On the other hand another reason the Middle East hates America so much is because of the aftermath of Cold War and all the devastating proxy fighting that happened in Afghanistan. We left them destroyed without any democracy or education systems then and it created Osama Bin Laden and Al Quada. We can't make the same mistakes again so we're stuck trying to build a house of cards.
I honestly don't know where to stand. I would like to see the military industrial complex dismantled and our involvement in the UN and the world bank/IMF ceased. I would like to see all of our troops home protecting us where we actually need them. That seems to be what Europe wants from us as well until they realize that the US won't be seen helping end genocide in Darfur, or death camps in Somalia, or the extermination of the Jews (again). Our intelligence agencies don't only protect America, they investigate terror threats world wide. The US would be condemned for no longer providing the VAST majority of the money in global monetary systems, which would ultimately foil the end goal of global socialism and a "fair" world. In protecting our own self-interests we shouldn't involve ourselves with global cap and trade/carbon credit schemes which are designed to bleed off money first world nations and distribute it amongst the third world. I think if the rest of the world doesn't want capitalism anymore than so be it, we'll keep it for ourselves be even richer (and our consumer products will cost even less) than ever before while Europe, in its quest for a fair world lowers its standard of living while trying to raise others, and so begin the bread lines. In short, America should expand the freedom and pursue the best interests of its people, and nothing else.
sorry for the rant but thats how I feel and obviously its a very confusing and disappointing time to be a human.